Women love men really ….?

1.  I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb ... and I also know that I'm not blonde. -Dolly Parton-

2.  You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. -Erica Jong-

3.  I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labour for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.

4.  I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog.

5.  Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.

6.  If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them.

7.  I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

-Roseanne Barr-

8.  I think-therefore I'm single.

9.  When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping.  Men invade another country.

10. Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

11. I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.

12. In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. -Margaret Thatcher-

13. I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine    marriage and a career.

14. I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.

15. Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths.

16. If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties?

How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?

17. I am a marvellous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. -Zsa Zsa Gabor-